If you want to lead out of your marriage, then you must make marriage – not leadership – your first ambition, your first passion, and your loudest gospel message. - Pete Scazzero
Recently we had the chance to talk to a man and his wife who came to a weekend workshop for married couples. He was the kind of engaging personality who is used to take center stage and attract attention, whereas his wife was a petite lady who was mostly standing back talking quietly and shyly. When asked what breakthrough they expected from God in their lives he immediately started to speak about his business (as many business people typically do). He owns a small company with a handful of employees and was currently facing some huge challenges. He had to lay off one of his staff members which obviously wasn't an easy decision for him. Moreover, another person of their team got sick and would not be able to come to work for several weeks. So, not an easy situation for him, which also caused some tensions in their marriage.
When we prayed for them we had the impression that God wants to release a 'new leadership model' for him and his wife, a leadership model called 'Leading out of Marriage'. For the man it means to make his marriage, not work or his company, his first priority. This entails more than working less and spending more time at home – leading out of marriage implies a completely changed attitude, a conscious decision, and a new lifestyle. His wife received encouragement and several promises from God – she is supposed to speak up and grow in self-confidence, as Jesus wants her to gain a voice and make herself heard, both in their marriage and in their company.
I believe that the definition of leadership success has to be transformed beyond just growing a business or succeeding at work to nurturing a passionate marriage that overflows to the rest of the world. We have noticed that people who lead out of their marriage, i.e. make their marriage their first priority, look and behave different. There is more peace, unity and freedom. You can literally feel the backing and encouragement of each other. I know this from my own life. When we are not connected at home, e.g. if we had an argument that hasn't been solved yet, then I'm also not able to perform to my best in the workplace. On the other hand, everything seems to be possible when I'm aware that I'm encouraged, supported and loved by my wife.
Prompt (if you are married): Is your marriage your first ambition and your first passion? What could you do to apply this leadership model?
